Short Funny Jokes

I slept with your mother!

Two guys are sitting on a bar stool. One starts to insult the other one. He screams, “I slept with your mother!”

The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the other weasel will do.

The first again yells, “I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!”

The other says, “Go home dad you’re drunk.”

Wife irritated by her husband’s lack of discretion

A man had six children and was very proud of his achievement.

He was so proud of himself that he started calling his wife, ‘Mother of Six’, in spite of her objections.

One night they went to a party. He decided that it was time to go home, and wanted to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well.

He shouted at the top of his voice,”Shall we go home, Mother of Six?”

His wife, irritated by her husband’s lack of discretion shouted back, “Anytime you’re ready, Father of Four!”

Lady Who Likes The Pink Color – Retirement Joke

A good looking young man (to an old woman):
Do you know any lady who likes the pink color, Madam?

Old woman: Why?

Young man: I would like to marry her.

Woman: I like pink color very much.

3 Tips how to order a pizza the fun way

1. Terminate the call with, “Remember, we never had this conversation.”

2. Give them your address, exclaim “Oh, just surprise me!” and hang up.

3. Change your accent every three seconds.

Car going the wrong way on Interstate 77!

As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang.

Answering, he heard his wife’s voice urgently warning him, “Herman, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on Interstate 77. Please be careful!”

“Heck,” said Herman, “It’s not just one car. It’s hundreds of them!”